Lately, I was just thinking about how many tricks our mind can play on us. It’s amazing and frightening to realize that we have a whole universe going on inside our heads. During these few months while I’ve been updating this site, adding the blog, designing, and slowly finishing all the illustrations I created specifically for it, I went through a lot of questions.
Inspiration is a tiny flame that, if well fed, will thrive into amazing deeds by the hands of any artist. But it is also frail. And a small blow of cold wind could turn it off for good. That’s why we cannot rely on inspiration when we are professional artists – and maybe that’s why I’m not fond of the word “artist” by itself. It implies that’s a kind of work that comes inherently from inspiration; so I often prefer professional illustrator. But back to the point, anything could be the cold wind that vanishes inspiration with the timing of a breath.
For me, comparison plays the huge villain when trying to maintain my inspiration, willpower, and focus in my personal projects. Questions that come, apparently from nowhere, like: “Why to do this?”, “Why does this even matter?”, “Who cares?”, accompanied by visions of other artists who might have started their careers even later – much later than me – and are far ahead. Like their work matters more than mine, because they’re further. And if theirs is more valuable, why should I even share mine? Why would anyone care about my art, when there’s already a handful of people sharing beautifully crafted things out there?
Putting it in words makes it easier to rationalize it and say “Well, because you are not them”, and try to convince myself with many clichés such as “I am the only me”. Not that it isn’t true, and any of us can absolutely find comfort in that. But that doesn’t come even close to giving back the determination we might need to keep going – especially when the inspiration flame has vanished, the project feels tiring and never-ending, and you catch yourself considering the most ridiculous ideas, such as going back to a 9-5 and giving up on sharing art with the world forever.
So how do we overcome the dark depths that stare at us every time our goals seem to be turning toward failure (even if only in our heads)? I tried to put together a simple list, that helped me, and might help you – hopefully – as well.
Avoid comparison at all costs.
When working on huge personal projects, you might want to look up references. They are important, especially on things like your website, a series of illustrations, concepts for a story, a YouTube channel. But that’s the most dangerous land an artist can ever walk on, so do it carefully and do it wisely. After seeing so much inspiring content, you’ll really start questioning everything I mentioned earlier, and if you are not strong, you’ll fall into the spider-web of comparison and get stuck there forever. It might later grow into horrible feelings, like disappointment and jealousy.
Of course “Don’t compare yourself” is a lot easier said than done. So even if you want to root for your fellow artists, but still hear that annoying voice inside of you saying how they’re better than you and their success means your failure (spoiler: it doesn’t), it’s ok to sign off. If you struggle with social media comparison, it’s ok to have a secondary account where you only follow memes, cute cats or aesthetic content that doesn’t relate to your niche. Or just don’t log in at all, until you feel mentally safe and strong and prepared to deal with other people’s paths crossing yours – or crossing ahead of the path you wish you were already on.
The internet is just a tiny frame of reality.
We can never forget that the internet is only a small frame. It does not reflect the reality of anyone showing up on whatever social media it is. As much as the creator intends to be transparent, it’s impossible to show people the full amount of struggle they actually face in their lives. Let alone the ones that only share the most perfect aspect of all their wins.
You cannot measure the wholeness of your behind the scenes by the final result of someone else. We don’t know how their paths have truly been, and sometimes we waste our precious mental energy comparing ourselves to a version of someone else that’s not even the real one – it’s just the version we can see through the internet.
I know many artists, and believe me: all the huge numbers on social media do not equal income; engagement does not equal professional fulfillment; and maybe that amazing, incredible art that you think they put together so effortlessly was actually a real challenge for them. So I can’t stress this enough: do not compare someone else’s end result with your process.
Stop thinking you are late.
I remember a dream I used to have regularly since my early 20s. In that dream, I was late for some kind of trip with my family, and I should put together all my luggage last minute and would always forget things. I remember the stressful feeling that I would be left behind – or would have to leave unprepared. This dream stopped once I got something crystal clear in my mind. I am not late, I have my own pace.
I wish I could create at a faster pace and so execute all the projects I have at the back of my mind. But I accepted that I have to do one thing at a time, planning and walking on baby steps (if that means the only way to move forward).
So you should remember. Your path is valuable, and every mistake you made in your life, before getting here, is what made you into you. And it’s those same mistakes, along with all your struggles, and decisions and wins that brought you exactly where you are now. And spend time considering the possibilities that never were, is useless and will delay you even more. Use your valuable time to analyze your past steps, learn from your mistakes, and that’s it. Do not dwell into the past.
[Dramatic pause for Sharon’s recommended soundtrack to the paragraph above: “Only Time”, Enya]
Hold onto that tiny light.
The flame of inspiration can always be recovered and put you back on track. Sign off from reality for just a little bit, and seek the inspiration again. Those first questions: “Why to do this?”, “Why does this even matter?”, “Who cares?” should be answered by you — clearly, honestly, and as soon as possible. That clarity is what brings you back.
Why do you do what you do? If you’re doing only for money, fame, and mundane things, you most likely won’t get far. No material thing is powerful as a deeper meaning. The answer could be your message to the world, or something as simple as “I love creating”. In a digital world that’s more annoyingly filled with AI-generated things every day, the very fact that you are a human being who wants to share your very human creations is already a huge deal.
During this never-ending process of updating my site with new codes, characters, and such – knowing very well that no one’s watching it (yet?), and that I was basically starting an audience from scratch ten years into my career, putting in so much effort for things that might go unnoticed – I had many doubts.
But when I saw the face of my 14 months old staring at Jonh’s subtle animation for my blog sidebar, that was my flame coming back.
You always have a flicker of light to hold onto. Go back to the point why you started on your project in the first place. Remember what you wanted to show people, and how you wanted them to feel with your art. Go for a walk in a beautiful place, read a fantasy story, watch your comfort movie. You’ll feel the tiny flame returning and glowing. And there you are: ready for another long round of fighting for your results.
It seems that my brief reflection was not quite brief. If you’ve read this far, I’d love to hear your thoughts!
Speak soon!
